Startling new health warnings!

Discussion in 'The Smoking Lounge' started by Old Ted, Apr 1, 2012.

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  1. Old Ted

    Old Ted Active Member

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    A recent bulletin from the department of public health and welfare states that stringent tests carried out on smokers, shows conclusively that the smoking of tobacco in pipes fashioned from corn cobs is causing many cases of loss of memory, repetition of speech and thought, and erectile disfunction.
    These symptoms were mainly prevelant in tests carried out on males - in the 50 - 70 age group, and can - in the early stages, be halted by smoking from pipes made from an alternative material.
    If reported cases increase substantialy, the departement will recomend the ceasation of corncob growth - for tobacco pipe production. You have been warned!.
    OT
     
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  2. Snake

    Snake permanent ankle biter

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    *whew!!* Good thing I only smoke Falcons! :D
     
  3. ol gto

    ol gto Member

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    Not an issue for me, the cob smoking is followed with a visit to my Dr. Grabow.:p:
     
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  4. Mike Pomery

    Mike Pomery Active Member

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    April Fools!
     
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  5. Lestrade

    Lestrade Active Member

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    Yep!
     
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  6. dmkerr

    dmkerr PG- free since '83! Moderator

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    Who are you?

    And furthermore, who are you?

    Your pal,
    Droopy
     
  7. IrishRover

    IrishRover Active Member

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    Whew.. thank goodness I am not 50 yet... LOL
     
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  8. ruffinogold

    ruffinogold Ruffinogold-Mayor, I.R.G.E.--At Large. Mayor

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    I cant ... cant ... remember .. why corn .... everything ... cant .... going soft ... . :cfsd:
     
  9. Darkly

    Darkly Active Member

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  10. Old Codger

    Old Codger Active Member

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    Could save a lot of money on books. Read the same one over and over and it'd be a surprise every time.
     
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  11. Dutchking22

    Dutchking22 Member

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    Smoking a cob does not affect your.....hold on, what was I saying? It'll come to me...... Did you know that smoking a corn cob pipe could affect your memory? :D
     
  12. Iain

    Iain Active Member

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    I don't think those symptoms have anything to do with corn cobs, I think they're more then likely caused by ... something ... I dunno, I can't remember.
     
  13. gunsmoke

    gunsmoke Member

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    No wonder I can hide my own Easter eggs.
     
  14. shadow

    shadow Active Member

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    AHA! That's why my local B&M sells their cobs with a free Viagra pill!!!!! Just don't forget to take it!:haha:
     
  15. Stonewall

    Stonewall Active Member

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    What's this thread about anyway?
     
  16. gunsmoke

    gunsmoke Member

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    Something about clay pipes making you ornery
     
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  17. Old Ted

    Old Ted Active Member

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    Nah! I can't swallow pills very well - so I sucked the last one.....had a stiff neck all day!:p:
     
  18. Darkly

    Darkly Active Member

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    *looks around all worried and anxious....* Who are you people.. and how the heck did I get in HERE?!:startl:
     
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  19. BradNTX

    BradNTX Well-Known Member

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    Great SCOTT! Send all your new cobs to me boys, and I'll burn them for you! :bing:
     
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  20. IrishRover

    IrishRover Active Member

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    :laff::haha::xd:
     
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